It feels like someone is slathering Icy Hot on my insides, starting in my stomach and working up to my throat.
Didn’t think it was possible to actually forget to breathe. My head feels like I just finished blowing up a bouncy castle by mouth because someone forgot to bring the motorized inflator.
Sit down for a minute.
It’s crazy to think I only have 3 weeks before I’m on a plane to the first stop of a year of traveling. And crazy I’ve been going.
So much can happen, especially when its a year AND 12 different locations. Having to think about what I might need just for every day living and working on top of all the additional precautions needed to protect against things like the now-a-concern Zika virus, Malaria (still debating the necessity of those $600 Malarone pills), altitude sickness, and so much more.
I find myself oscillating between extreme excitement about the wild adventure I’m about to embark on and terrifying anxiety about the fact that I still don’t have a full time job, I’ve never traveled this extensively, and I attract mosquitos like the golden SoCal coast attracts surfers.
It’s a bit overwhelming and I wish I could say that I’m as cool and collected on the inside as I may seem on the outside, but I’ve had to create a few habits to keep myself level-headed (I’ll share those in another post soon…as a preview, morning ritual is a big one).
I think of what it’s probably like for the other 74 people – chillin’, already perfectly packed bags, sleeping outside to test the effectiveness of their mosquito nets (can you tell I’m really concerned about the mosquitos?! I know…you’re thinking…honey, that should be the least of your worries. But think back to the last time you were trying to sleep and were haunted by the high-pitched hovering tickle in your eardrum or the addicting draw of an itch pinging from a swollen mound on your foot).
Why am I freaking out? It’s that whole survivor mentality thing. I sometimes slip into the mindset that I need to be absolutely 100% prepared for every situation that I might encounter (ie. I need to get pepper spray in case I get mugged…but probably not). Then I remind myself that the truth is, things rarely go according to plan and I’ll probably have to deal with things I never imagined would be things. And that’s okay. Sometimes I forget that I’ve done this before – move to a new place with no plan and figuring it out, being flexible, and making it work. Examples: going to college in LA from Germany, going to Korea after graduating from college, and going back to LA after Korea without a job.
Ohhh the excitement of the waiting game.
The waiting game always creates ants in one’s pants…so I usually end up creating random things like this video of when I was trapped at home because of Blizzard Jonas:
But that’s all part of the process! Now, there are a few realities I’ve had to face so I can settle my nerves and get out of my head.
Coming up next – what I’ve done so far and what I still need to do in preparation for the year-long trip ahead. Overall, suuuuuuuuuuper excited!!!!